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WEIRDO FLICKS: 'For Y'ur Height Only'

by Eli Kroes

You might not be familiar with the term 'Z-Movie,' but if you grew up in the 90's, chances are you've seen one. They're the beyond-low-budget monstrosities that teased you from the walls of the mom-and-pop video store. Usually, the films themselves could never live up to the pictures on the videotape boxes (because this was way before your fancy 'Digital Video Discs' and 'Blu-Rays') but occasionally you'd find something truly unique. 'WEIRDO FLICKS' will clue you into some movies which 'unique' doesn't even begin to describe... 

 'For Y'ur Height Only' - 1981, Directed by Eddie Nicart

This is a Filipino parody of the James Bond films featuring a midget called 'Agent 00.' If that doesn't make you want to see this, then nothing will.

If you're the type of person who shies away from subtitles, don't worry because this one's in English. Or at least, it's dubbed over. Or something. Regardless, whatever humor director Nicart and company were attempting does not translate. That doesn't mean you won't laugh. Some of the dialog is so left-field and bizarre that you can't help but chuckle, and who doesn't love to see a midget sliding across the floor like a hockey puck?

Basically, it's just like a Bond movie, with Agent 00 attempting to stop a bad guy called Mr. Giant. He's kidnapped a scientist and wants the plans to said scientist's N-bomb so he can mess with everybody. Agent 00 fights him with a variety of Bond-esque gadgets that range from a remote-controlled hat and a poison-detecting gold ring. He also always gets the girl, and his action-hero quips are just as misinformed as you'd imagine.

It should be noted that this is just  as entertaining as any of the 80's Bond films, and maybe even more so. In fact, it doesn't play so much as a parody as a cheaply-made Bond film with a midget. Great, great stuff, and even better with a few friends.

Also, legend has it the film was the only thing from the 1981 Manila Film Festival to catch the attention of a western audience, much to the dismay of first lady Imelda Marcos. In a totally bizarre twist,  leading man Weng Weng supposedly became a real life secret agent sometime after the film's release. This was because of his small size and quickness, which you'll no doubt see in the film.

It's slightly more readily available than the other films I've featured here, too. 

6 out of 5.

VHS photo by Toby Hudson.